This post is inspired by my client John M., a financial analyst in his mid 40s from New York.
John just started dating again, but suffered initial setbacks when some of his dates mentioned to him flat out that they didn’t find his attire very attractive. Discouraged but optimistic, he asked me if I can help him put together some casual yet sharp looks for dinner or drink dates that would bolster his confidence and make an appealing first impression.
His biggest conundrum involved jeans. See, the only pair of jeans he owned were “Seinfeld” era mid-tone stone-washed relaxed-fit dad jeans, with a waist that rode all the way up to his ribcage. Tasteless comments from his past dates aside, no wonder they ran the other way!
John’s top goal was to find a new pair of jeans that he could incorporate into his date looks as well as for his one-Friday-a-month “Jeans Day” at his conservative workplace. After a lifetime of high-rise jeans, it wasn’t easy persuading him to a lower rise – not too low, but just low enough to make him look current and more proportionate. I even found a great pair that actually gave him a nice perky butt on his tall skinny frame, as his current pair only helped to flatten his already-nonexistent backside.
After somewhat of a fight, John finally succumbed to giving the jeans a try, which then gave me the green light to put together the rest of the look. All his shirts were on the neutral-drab side, so I challenged him to a soft pop of color, added a sweater, and topped him off with a textured tweed jacket. With everything coordinated and fitting him properly (like most guys, he was wearing his clothes at least a size too big), not only was he well-presented, he looked at least 10 years younger!
As John saw a new vision of himself in the mirror that he never dreamed possible, I had the pleasure of witnessing the moment I always look forward to with all my clients – what I call “The Shift.” This is when the light suddenly switches on inside a man, most notably by a twinkle in his eye, and his energy escalates to a palpable excitement as he looks in the mirror and approves of what he sees staring back at him, often for the first time in his life. That’s the part I love the most about what I do.
Thought I’d switch things up a bit today and tell you this story instead of my usual how-to content. The items here aren’t what I recommended to John (his was specific to his personality, lifestyle, work environment, comfort level and budget), but the essence is shared.
And the overarching tip here is this: Layers make you interesting. More layers with colors, textures and patterns make you intriguing. Add a few unique accessories, and you’re alluring. Finish with a complex, deeply masculine scent and you’re irresistible.
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